Gnomes are hiding our car keys. I swear I am late every time I try to leave because for some reason my keys are missing. It never fails. No matter the amount of dangly bobs, or key chain fobs, I can never locate the stupid keys. The problem is that I have specific keys that I need for work, and should I ever lose them... I would be dead. So why don't you just put them in the same place every time??? I do, dangit!! Its the gnomes! They follow me around the house, and when I'm not looking, they take my keys and bury them in a pile of laundry or under a couch. My family lives in a state of fear.
gnomophobia affects millions of people.
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